i got the job! i'm so so so so so so so excited. i don't know if that even illustrates how excited i am for this summer! and even more, i just wish the entire month of may would fly by so i could just be in okoboji right now away from all the people and things i can't stand at this point. even some of my best friends seem to be cutting me down lately. and i don't know if it's my mood, all in my head, or if they're really annoyed of me; but especially one girl, who i thought was my best friend and never seemed to have a problem with me whatsoever, seems for the past like two weeks to have been ignoring me, and finding every excuse she can to avoid hanging out with me at all. i don't understand. i'm literally sitting here crying because i'm so confused. i feel like stephanie is my only friend who honestly cares about me anymore. i just want to get to camp already to make new friends and start over on a completely clean slate. even just get back to harlan to relax and be stress-free for a couple weeks. i don't understand what is so wrong with me that my best friends seem to be turning on me. i feel like i've repeatedly been ditched by one of my two very best friends this past month. i don't know how to handle it. i feel awful. i really just need to get away. i wish she would just tell me truth though.